Thursday, September 19, 2013

I hate migraines!

Reasons I HATE migraines:

1 - They HURT.

2 - They're ANNOYING.

3 - You lose hours at a time, sometimes DAYS in a row, of your life.

4 - You don't know what's going on outside your pain.

5 - You can't be there for your kids or husband.

6 - Your kids are effected. Suddenly their mom just can't be present anymore. I can't talk to them, can't help them, can't even have them in the room with me :(

7 - My husband has to take over completely when he's at home, after working all day. Sometimes for several evenings in a row and a whole weekend. It's not fair to him.

8 - My mom cancels her plans and keeps her schedule open because she never knows when I will need her. (I can't say how MUCH I appreciate this!) But it's not fair to her.

9 - Your kids cry because they want their mom and things just aren't normal for them.

10 - When you come out of your migraine fog you hardly know what day it is. You don't know what's happened while you were out of it. You don't know where things are in your house. Your house is usually a wreck. The kids do things and get into things they're not supposed to. You have to reorganize and resettle your family back into normal day to day life.

11 - Your kids act like brats for two days after you recover because they want their grandma and have been spoiled rotten for a few days.

12 - Just because your migraine is over doesn't mean you're instantly back to normal. Sometimes it takes me two days to feel normal again.

13 - You plan everything knowing that if you have a migraine your plans will be canceled. Your kids have their plans canceled often.. and now take it in stride.. because it happens so often. You pray hard to be able to make it through one event and it feels like you won the lottery when you make it through your son's birthday without a migraine.

14 - If you take anything for pain you worry about your unborn baby. How does all this effect the baby?

15 - One side of your face gets burned, often, from heated rice socks. Not using them is not an option during a migraine. One side of your face looks burned for days after your migraine. After years of migraines and using rice socks one side of your face is actually much more wrinkled and damaged than the other side.

16 - You can't do lots of normal, every day things you would love to do without lots of planning and or compromising. I've never been to a concert and not sure I could go to one. The noise and lights can be huge triggers. Even the circus (!) can be a trigger. Besides swimming you can't do any summer activities outside. The heat and sun are triggers. Even a few hours at the pool takes planning. Will there be shade? Do you have all your migraine pills and "gear"? You can't stay too long, regardless. Painting your house has to be done with caution and sometimes rescheduled for days or weeks at a time because you can't handle the smell. And SO much more.

17 - Time on your laptop can be a trigger. So blogging, uploading/editing/organizing photos and connecting online have to wait until you can handle it.

18 - When you are able to take a prescription you have constant anxiety that your pills are running out for the month and you won't be able to get more for several days or weeks.

19 - You seriously consider NOT trying for a fourth baby even though you've always hoped for four kids because you're not sure it's fair to yourself to put yourself through another 9 months of migraine pain, it's not fair to your children, your husband or your mom....

20 - You're planning to not breast feed your baby because you know you can't go through several months of breast feeding another baby without a prescription.

20 - You were in a migraine fog for a good part of all your pregnancies and a lot of your kids early years.

21 - You have anxiety and mood swings because you are SO worried and fearful of getting another migraine. Every sound, light and smell can be triggers and your kids have to be very quiet and mindful of your headaches ALL the time. They can't play with certain toys, watch certain shows, go certain places, play outside when they want to and more because you could get a migraine.

22 - You try to cram all your cleaning and normal life into a few days because you *know* you only have so much time before another round of migraines hit.

23 - Almost every vacation and many special occasions from your past are littered with memories of having a migraine. Had a bad one in Jerusalem. Check. Had a bad one during that awesome musical. Check. Had one in Peru. Check. Was crying during church because my head hurt so bad. Check. Had one on the plane to Germany. Check. Threw up in Mexico City while an old boyfriend held my hair back. Check. Couldn't go to a friend's wedding shower because I had a migraine. Couldn't go to a friend's engagement party. Got a migraine and threw up in my Honda Accord, all over myself in my Honda Pilot, outside my VW Bug, in my parent's van. On and on. I hate that my life has revolved around stupid migraines for SO many years!

(Disclaimer: Some of this list applies only to migraines in pregnancy/this pregnancy.  I know that people all over the world go through things MUCH worse than migraines and don't have the help that I have. But you know what? I just need to vent. Migraines really SUCK for me. Really suck. This is MY life and what I go through. My life may be better or worse than your's or someone else's but this is what I'm going through. I try to stay positive and suck it up. I try to keep things in perspective. I AM thankful that I have lots of good days, I have wonderful help and at least I can take a prescription when I'm not pregnant. But for the last few months my life has REALLY revolved around migraines and this is what I have been going through, more than ever, lately.) 

1 comment:

  1. Wow! I feel like I just read my own list of Migraine memories...luckily I recently found a med that seems to be keeping them at bay more often than not. Yet you list is VERY accurate and something only a fellow sufferer could relate to.